Cliches of breastfeeding

Breast is best rhymes and is more or less true so we probably won't be able to do much about this one.

Nursing like a champ in reference to a latchy newborn. Are there nursing championships? How does one enter? What is the prize? Why does everyone say this?

Liquid gold designating colostrum. I think this might have originated in The Womanly Art, but I gave my copy away to a boob hell mom once my couch lost enough legs that I didn't need the book to prop it up any more. Incidentally, TWA is one of the books I see most often on the shelf at my nearest Goodwill. Haven't seen BH  there yet.

I'm pretty concerned that breastfeeding lit won't become a serious subgenre until we get past these.

Oh, now I get it!

Oh yeah, I'm supposed to be selling a book here or something

My mom is really good at selling things. She is so good at it that she gets paid a ton of money by a commercial company you've almost certainly heard of to teach people how to sell things. Unfortunately I didn't get the "selling things" gene, which makes for some awkward conversations when my mom asks how my book is selling.

Selling things makes me feel like I'm defrauding people. If they REALLY wanted this thing, they'd have tracked it down and bought it already, right? But, come on. I really wanted to read Boob Hell when I was there and I know other people are in BH right now feeling like so miserable. It's a matter of finding them. In fact, I have no desire for non-boob hellions to read it because they'd think really stupid things about it. So we're all above board here.

Nevertheless, I must find the boob hellions and sell them the book, which is where this post comes in. I made one of those badge thingies that all the cool blogs have. So if you've been there and have some very modest desire to alert people that you lived through something awful that they don't think even matters and you should basically never allude to or think about, you can have a badge for it, and I can tell my mom I did something to try to sell my book. I made a tab for it and everything. Wow, that was gratifying.





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